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Shaggy Dog Stories (More Random Jokes)



Old Fur     (Search for similar jokes)
Animal activist Bo Derek was horrified to learn that the Queen of England wears antique sable coats.
She decided to confront the Queen over the issue, and arranged to get herself invited to an event which the Queen was also due to attend.
So a couple of months later, there they were at a very high class tea party. Rich people everywhere. Bo started looking around for the Queen. Sure enough, there she was. It was time for the confrontation!
She marched up to the Queen, and demanded an answer.
Elizabeth responded haughtily: "Some wear old fur to reign, Bo."
(old_fur: 88 of 131)


End of the world?     (Search for similar jokes)
On a road through a desert in Arizona, a preacher named Nathaniel Evans walked every day, preaching to the many people who roared past in their cars.
"Repent, the End of the World is Nigh!" was his constant theme.
One day, as he was walking, he came to a big lever in the middle of nowhere, just by the side of the road. 'Pull this to end the world' said the sign on it.
Now Nathaniel saw this as the perfect spot for him to preach, and soon many automobiles were parked nearby, the people all swayed by his powerful elocution.
All was well, until there were so many people, and so many cars, that the road was nearly blocked. Then a big 18-wheel rig came down the highway, and couldn't stop in time. The driver had a choice: run over Nathaniel, or run over the Lever.
As the driver explained to the Highway Patrol later, he actually had no choice. Pointing to the red smear on the road that used to be Nathaniel Evans, he said "Better Nate than Lever."

(Submitted by Alan Brain)
(end_of_the_world: 89 of 131)


Split Personality     (Search for similar jokes)
I once had a friend who was a renowned clinical psycologist. He used to tell me about all the patients he had seen. One of the most interesting cases he told me about involved a schizophrenic with multiple personality disorder.At times this person believed himself to be a temptress in a Bizet opera. At other times he was convinced that he was the head of the German Luftwaffe in WW II.
The concensus of the practitioners was that the poor fellow didn't know if he was Carmen or Goerring...
(split_personality: 90 of 131)


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